We finally did it.
After 8 different concerts of us pestering these angry Australian men (one of them requiring us to drive to the wasteland known as Florida), they finally decided they wanted to work with us. With the number of stickers we kept giving them at every Atlanta show, the streets of Melbourne and every Pelican case in their possession must be covered in waifus at this point. Glad we could contribute to society in a meaningful way.
"Waifu Wolf?"
said Dollie, gnawing at their cage aggressively (they're never escaping). Why yes! Turn these angry Australian men into angry and highly marketable anime women! No fan at the merch table would be able to resist five different sets of anime thighs and tits (and maybe feet if you're freaky). And so then and there, our lab rat scientists at Always Sick t̶o̶r̶t̶u̶r̶e̶d̶ took care of Dollie as they slaved away at drawing five gender-bent versions of the members of Alpha Wolf.
The result:
Throughout the process, we questioned ourselves. "Is this weird? Will they think this is weird? Will they think this is hot? Will it give them a boner? Why is this giving me a boner?" As we showed the designs to Lochie and company, we let out a sign of relief as we saw the (Australian) dollar signs appear in their eyes, ready to buy the designs right there and then. We (definitely not nervously) shook hands on an agreement, and the rest is history.